Trauma as a Magical Portal
Welcome to my blog. In my typical fashion, I want to jump right in to the meat and potatoes of my work. For almost 10 years, I have been navigating the liminal space where magic and mental illness meet. I feel my work in this very sick world is to encourage people to embrace their magic and wellness in the very real context of mental illness. I am very cerebral and have a lot of ideas. Neurodivergent people often do! What I write about here are my internal musings, messages from my guides and my own research. My real life experience informs my work and I hope it can support you on your journey.
I feel that it is important to reclaim and alchemize our trauma. Why? Because it is a portal for magic. It is often an initiation that brings psychic and spiritual gifts. This is in no way an effort to romanticize trauma. I hate it when people do that. Rather, it is an effort to empower people who have experienced trauma and reclaim the experiences for the magical purpose—healing, transformation, and the elevation of consciousness on the planet. Reclaiming the gifts within the wounds of trauma can change the world.
Most of my clients struggle with boundaries and empathy more than anything else. This has always been my challenge as well. I feel that is why my clients gravitate towards me. My understanding is that most empaths have had their boundaries taken from them at a young age or were never taught to use them. That was certainly my experience. What’s more, when empaths feel their environment is unsafe due to abuse or something that reminds them of abuse, there is a hyper attention towards predicting others’ behavior. Micromovements become heightened, predicting someone’s next step becomes critical. These painful experiences are training the mind to develop psychic abilities and extra sensory capacities. We can heal and reclaim the pain in our lives and lineages. It is possible to feel grief about our trauma and also see it as a portal to our gifts. Both can be true.
To learn more about trauma, the nervous system and magic, check out the writings of Larisa Noonan, one of my teachers at larisanoonan.com
“There is a crack in everything; that’s how the light gets in”- Leonard Cohen
When boundaries are porous or not there at all, anything can get it—other people’s bullshit, unwanted energies, etc etc, we all know what that feels like. However, light, beauty and magic ALSO come in. Spirit guides, nature spirits, angels and more can more easily come through to bless and inform us. This doesn’t happen to other people as easily! What a gift! When we reestablish healthy boundaries and energetic protections, WE get to decide when, how and WHAT magic comes in. I’ll speak from personal experience and tell you that too much magic coming in makes you literally crazy. I had a major manic episode this past summer because my third eye was blown wide open and the entire universe was flowing in to tell me any and everything. I always say that the brain is a computer and mine ran out of bandwidth and short-circuited. It wasn’t fun. It can be confusing to establish healthy boundaries. In my case, with bipolar disorder, the over expanded magical consciousness can be intoxicating. Why would I want to create boundaries with it? Because too much of ANY energy that is not ours put tremendous strain on our nervous systems and ultimately leads to imbalance, some bigger than others, but imbalance nonetheless. With the support of plants, magical techniques, and mood stabilizers, I am alchemizing my trauma into healing magic to share with others. I’ve been there, I’m still there, we are getting through this together.
Yarrow- The plant of the wounded healer. My go to for boundaries and protection
How do we reclaim out boundaries? Well I’m going to tell you straight up that it’s not easy. I’ve been working on this for many many years and I still have issues with it all the time. Its hard to rewire patterns AND build new ones. Woof, is it a lot. But don’t despair! The key to growing on this journey is knowing you cannot do it alone. I know it’s really hard to let go of control. It’s the worst. BUT it’s so so important to accept that support is all around you and you DESERVE to take it. I spent almost 7 years off of psych meds and really struggled with maintaining my boundaries. I absorbed everything and NEEDED to cultivate skills and protections or I wouldn’t be able to function. This is when I began to lean on the plants for support.
If there is one plant to get to know, it’s Yarrow. Yarrow is so very dear to my heart because they (I don’t assign plants genders) have provided me with so much compassion and support. Yarrow’s botanical name is Achillia Millefolium, named for the myth of Achilles. Perhaps you may recall, Achilles’ mother dipped him by the heal in a bath of yarrow to protect him in battle. The yarrow did not reach his heal, therefore he bled from it forever. I won’t get into the myriad physical benefits of yarrow, but I will mention that is a supreme remedy for the blood. Yarrow can stop bleeding when needed as well as encourage blood flow when needed. Very intelligent.
Energetically and emotionally, Yarrow addresses where we are “bleeding out” our energy. Yarrow coagulates physical wounds by stitching them together and does the very same with our energy bodies. Yarrow knits together our porous boundaries and protects our energy. Brilliant. This is one of the reasons Yarrow is connected to the wounded healer architype and is an incredible ally for empaths who are leaning into their healing and psychic gifts. I have considered getting a Yarrow tattoo. This is how much this plant means to me. Yarrow is actually a very bitter plant which is physically medicinal but can be unpleasant. I always recommend bathing in Yarrow or putting the flower essence in a room or body spray. Even just putting some next to your bed or on your alter is really healing.
I recently developed the Psychic Support Session as a way to step into my role as the wounded healer. With the combination of my skills and life experiences, I want to share what I’ve learned through my hardships and also the gifts I have honed in the process. We’re in this together!
If you are an empath, sensitive witch and/or someone who navigates the intersections of magic and mental illness, this session is for YOU!
This session is a constellation of my many skills. I incorporate Tarot, Reiki, Sound Healing, Meditation and Spirit Guide Communication to support your magical mind.
If you are looking to shift and clear stuck energy, reinforce your psychic boundaries, and connect with your spirit guides, this session is for you.
I know money is rough right now so I’m offer sliding scale. I never want money to be a barrier for anyone.
Speaking of money, it’s more affordable to purchase a package of sessions. If my words and work are resonating with you and you’re ready to invest in your magic and gifts, sign up for a four session package! The packages are also offered at a sliding scale rate. Magic is for everyone!
In summation, YOU GOT THIS. All your experiences are real. The pain and the magic is real. You CAN reclaim you psychic space and your boundaries and you WILL. I’m on this journey with you. If you don’t already, be sure to follow me on Instagram for more magical musings, mental health advocacy, and psychic thoughts.